Climbing the Tree...one branch up - two brick walls back

I began my genealogy hobby around 1970, after a family reunion (of my maternal relatives) that included a mystery -- was the Texas line an illegitimate offspring of a husband who deserted his Pennsylvania family for a western adventure, or were we not related at all?  But that's another story (and another line).  Suffice it to say that my passion for genealogy began there. As a college student, though, I had the enthusiasm, but not the time, discipline or organizational skills to do more than haphazardly pursue this dream I had to find "all my relatives." Obviously, I was also very naive about the extent of the work ahead.

In the ensuing 30 years, I gathered much information, made a few (exciting!) research trips, and compiled a mountain of information.  My research was extensive; my documentation was not.  That's one thing I have worked to correct in the last 10 years.  I encourage you to keep up with it as you go. It makes the task much easier and your information more reliable and useful to those who follow you.

As a single parent, I found it difficult to find moments to conduct meaningful research, so I often set the family history aside for long periods of time. I was in such a downturn in my research, living a very day-to-day, moment-to-moment life, when JennieV contacted me for help with her research, shortly after my divorce. I had also just moved to a new town and a new job, and all my research was packed away. So, I put her request aside with the best intentions of responding to her request when I unpacked.  Then life, as it does, intervened. About this time my mother began the first of several bouts of cancer, and my home was robbed as I was with her in the hospital.  Add that to the everyday demands of raising my young son, and being the best I could be for my students.  It was a full life, one with little time for a hobby that I loved, but that demanded too much of my limited time. 

All that to say that JennieV's request for help was lost, and eventually forgotten altogether.  It is one of those examples, so familiar to genealogists, of an opportunity lost.  How much richer my own experiences would have been, how much more I could have learned from working with her, I can only guess. And that is most definitely my loss.

For those of you who have read her manuscript, you know that her voice rings out loud and clear throughout the pages. What I would give to be able to ask her all those questions I did not have time for when she was asking for my help.

Fortunately, others heeded her call and my neglect did not prevent JennieV from completing her work. One of my sisters eventually made contact with her, and purchased several copies of her book.  She reported that JennieV was a delightful and gracious lady.  Sadly, I never had the privilege of meeting her myself -- another lost opportunity. 

I have the usual genealogists' regrets -- why didn't I find time to finish labeling (with her) all the pictures that my mother eventually left me? Why didn't I ask my great-aunt and great-uncle the right questions? Etc. Etc.  They (and others) all had knowledge that could have added volumes to my search.  But JennieV was a kindred spirit; she felt the thrill of finding a dusty record in a courthouse, of finding a picture of a long-lost relative. So that precious and lost opportunity will weigh heavily on my heart for the rest of my life.

And those of you who are reading this, please learn from my example and try to miss fewer of these opportunities.